A wish upon a star


It may be this time of year when all of our fears and worries step forward in to the light and confuse us. Or maybe I’m just an unfortunate exception, standing in that light, realizing the one thing we all crave so much has slipped through my fingers. I have forgotten how to be happy and how to find this happiness, that will make my life more than just an existence.

I’m not passionate about anything anymore. With a straight face I go on with my day hoping it will pass quickly, because another may be different. But it never is. I’m soaked in dead and grey. Seeing the same old depressing outcome of my actions. I rarely relish even the smallest of things; music, which used to bring me immense amount of thrill. Gaming, which once was my anchor on stormy tides. And there is so much more I wish to revel in; but all of these inconsequential things are being devoured by a void inside my heart. Forced into being something that they are not. Nothing seems to be enough. Do I crave too much of life? Can’t I be spared a little passion and a little meaning? I wish it was just a phase or thoughts passing through, but it weighs heavily on my chest. I feel the dearth of meaning in my life and it makes me sad to live just for the sake of living.

I look at other people and what they have accomplished through their hard work and I’m jealous, because I will never be as determined to finish what I have started nor enjoy the process. I’d like to blame it on the balance of this world, but deep down I know I’m the problem.

And if I could wish upon a star, I’d like a spark in me to find what I’m meant to do and for enough fight to make it happen.

17 thoughts on “A wish upon a star

  1. Life is beautiful. The moment you realize that life is not about your friends but you, it becomes quite easy. Do what you can at any given point with magnificence. Everything else is secondary! What my friends have is non-issue to me! What matters is whether I am better than I were yesterday….If no, what can I do to change the situation


  2. You are great the way you are! There are times when we feel that we are such a failure, but that’s okay! I think what really matters is what action you do next. If you decide to make things better, you can be a better person. And it’s a step further as compared to those who are complacent and failing to see that they need improvement.


  3. I’m so sorry you’re not finding joy in your life. My wish for you is that you get that hope back. It might take some time and hard work, but you WILL get there!


  4. The things you speak of are all symptoms of depression. It can sneak up on us like that, and it isn’t just an overabundance of sadness and tears, it manifests as a joyless existence, without that spark of joy, a lack of desire to do the things we used to love. Please consider speaking to your doctor or health care provider. They can put you in touch with whatever services are offered in your area, and can prescribe medication to help get started on healing your brain. The spark is still there, your brain is simply hiding it from you. Help yourself by seeking help.


  5. I am so sorry you are struggling. Times can get tough but you can pull through. Look at this blog you created, that is something you should be proud of.


  6. Hey there, I mean I get what you are going through, it gets like that sometime, you just wish that every day would just end soon, but that is just that, a bad time, you just need to take some time off, try out something new, be with friends, have a week to yourself or something, it will get better, one day you will just wake up and be, I want to make a change today, don’t give up and don’t think about giving up, bad days pass, good days stay

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hi there! Cheer up! Those successful people you see are also experiencing those before they become what hey are now! So hold on, if you can, go out, talk to someone. You are just on the process. Feel free to talk.


  8. Hey! I often find myself feeling like this, looking around and envious that other people seem to be achieving and loving life and that i feel how i do. But i try to remind myself that people very often put on a brave face and when you look deeper we are all in the same boat – trying to achieve and love life. It can be tough but i also know that I tend to put too much pressure on yourself and the first step to happiness is not comparing yourself to others. Be you! Also, well done for speaking out 🙂 x


  9. Hey these sort of phases come in life but we have to keep moving forward, try out new different things and soon you will find out your passion again a new hobby or skills.
    You are perfect already don’t doubt it, you are a great writer who can convey their thoughts so wonderfully, I can’t pen down my thoughts the way you did it 👍🏻 Great post Please do keep them coming! 🤗💐


  10. I do hope you can find room in your heart to recognize what a beautiful, reflective soul and writer you are. We all have ups and downs in life and we must get up and keep going forward… Hugs and love.


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